If you end up in divorce court, with a judge determining how custody of your children should get divided between you and your ex, the judge is going to ask a number of questions to better evaluate the situation. The judicial preference is for shared custody between you and your ex, but they still have to decide if that is really best in your unique case.
Parents often try to think about what their children need most after a divorce. Do they need less focus on rules and more fun time? Do they need more time with friends? Should they get them some of the things they have been clambering for, like the newest gaming system?
The child custody arrangement that the court helps you set up when you get divorced is based on the facts of the case at that time. If those facts change, you may need to ask for an alteration later on.
You got custody in the divorce, and your child lives with you most of the time. Your ex is still around, though, and the child lives with them every other weekend.
Divorced parents often feel an inclination to compete with one another. You want your child to love you more than your ex. Or, at least, you want them to prefer you. When it's time in the custody schedule for your child to leave your ex's house and come to your house, you want them to be excited. On top of that, you want them to be disappointed to leave.
In divorce cases, grandparents may worry about their own rights to see their grandchildren after the split. That divorce makes family life far more complicated, but they love the children and still want to stay involved with them.
When you were married, family vacations meant you, your spouse and your kids. After the divorce, you still want to take vacations, but it's a one-parent-only situation. That's the most natural setup, as even parents who get along after divorce often do not want to spend that much time together.
As you move toward divorce with your spouse, you decide to tell family members and friends. But then you start wondering about your child's teacher at school. Should you tell them? Or is that oversharing? Do they need to know?
The gender assumptions and stereotypes that used to plague child custody cases are starting to disappear. More and more, for instance, both men and women get shared custody of the kids rather than seeing it heavily favor mothers.
People often fall into the same old patterns when trying to figure out how to set up a child custody plan. For instance, they simply alternate weeks or send the kids to the father's house on the weekends.